


Starless

by orphan_account



Category: Kuroko no Basuke | Kuroko's Basketball
Genre: Akashi is not okay, And probably won't be for awhile, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Suicide, M/M, Suicide Hotline, What is the meaning of life, angst I suppose, but i tried okay, hell if i know, romance eventually
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-01-18
Updated: 2017-02-04
Packaged: 2018-09-18 08:32:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 11,678
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9376874
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: One night, as Kuroko is covering for a friend at the Crisis Support Center, he receives a call.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> So, this was sitting in my drafts for forever, since summer I think, and I finally forced myself to post it! My sister liked it so I don't know. It's rather weird. My thoughts are strange. I think it was the middle of the night when I wrote this, so...  
> Anyway! I hope you enjoy!

This was not how Kuroko Tetsuya planned his Saturday night, not at all. He imagined he would simply head to bed at a reasonable hour and get a good night sleep, since it was, after all, Sunday tomorrow. However, these plans were thrown out the window by an unexpected phone call from one of his friends. So now the rather tired tealnet was standing in front of a plain gray building with a title that read _Crisis Support Services_ in the middle of the night. He could rarely spot any people this time of the night in the streets, and it was no wonder. This specific region of the city didn't have a lot of nightclubs and such things, so there weren't real reasons why one would be wandering through the dark alleys or why would a car speed off. And yet, there were always _that_ kind of people.

With a tired sigh Kuroko finally pressed the cold handle and entered the building. Immediately soothing warmth welcomed him, lifting the tealnet's mood even just a little bit. It was already the second part of autumn, and even if it didn't yet snow, the weather outside was quite chilly, so Kuroko was glad to finally get out of it. Unfortunately, the male didn't take in account when leaving his apartment the temperature change regarding night and day. It was, after all, noticeably colder this hour. But Kuroko, being as tired as he was, forgot about that and went out with just a plain jacket. Needless to say, by the time he reached his destination, the poor tealnet was frozen from head to toe. So naturally the warmth of the inside soothed him immensely.

Just as Kuroko entered the building and was thinking of heading to the front desk, one of the doors a bit further down the gray corridor shot open and the culprit for Kuroko's upcoming sleepless night ran out. Before the tealnet could blink the man was in front of him.

''I can't thank you enough for agreeing to come, Kuroko-kun,'' he spoke with audible gratitude and that was accompanied by a sincere smile. However, anxious still managed to break through his mask.

''I couldn't just refuse... You're my friend after all, Ogiwara-kun,'' the tealnet murmured as he unconsciously rubbed one of his eyes. He really did need sleep tonight. ''Besides, you sounded urgent...''

''I really am,'' the man sighed deeply. ''Something came up... But I can't just leave my post like that, and you were the first person I thought of, so...''

''I feel honored,'' Kuroko stated, though it was rather unclear what he actually thought. It was a very high chance that he would have liked it better if he wasn't woken up at two in the morning and asked to act as substitute for a 24-hour crisis hot-line. No, he would have very much enjoyed swimming in his dreamland sea much more. But his priorities stood elsewhere.

''I owe you a lot,'' Ogiwara grinned and beckoned for his friend to follow him. ''Let's go, I'll show you all the things you need to know. I won't be gone for too long though, so don't worry too much, it's unlikely you'll get any calls before I get back.''

Kuroko just nodded and kept silent. Honestly speaking, he did feel slightly anxious about this whole substitution thing, since he had never did something similar before. If a person who, let's say, had mental problems called, how was he supposed to help? Did Ogiwara even think this through? The tealnet could only hope such a situation wouldn't arise.

After about five minutes Kuroko was already seated at his friend's place with the basic understanding about his substitution duties. The rest of the staff didn't seem to mind him all that much, that or they just simply forgot about him immediately after Ogiwara introduced him, which was a very likely chance. Either way, Kuroko chose not to fret about them. All he needed to do was simply be there and wait for any possible calls. It was his duty to answer them and talk to the person on the other end with the hopes of somehow helping them. Ogiwara also had a personal computer there, but since his friend wasn't fond of them all that much, he didn't intend on using it.

Truth be told, never in his life did Kuroko have suicidal thoughts, actual suicidal ones. He simply always had something to live for, no matter how sometimes small those things were. It could have been merely an up-coming release of a book he was waiting for or some sort of drawing he was working on. He couldn't just leave it unfinished after all. Besides, all of those details aside, the tealnet always had people who he thought cared. No matter how sometimes hard life got, even the tiniest of thoughts of burdening someone with his own foolish decisions occurred, Kuroko immediately wiped any suicidal thoughts away. No, the young student had reasons for living. He was certain that everyone had, but sometimes some tended to forget that. Sometimes the darkness overwhelmed the light, but that only happened when the person himself chose such a path.

Similar thoughts ran through Kuroko's tired mind and he felt himself beginning to slip away. This week was certainly a stressful one. He still had that still life painting to finish by Monday, and tomorrow was already Sunday. Not to mention tonight's course of events. Kuroko didn't want to admit it, but he was also beginning to feel slight aching in his throat area, which honestly made him worry. The up-coming days were sure to be full of work, so no way could the tealnet afford falling ill. If only he wasn't so stupid and had brought something warmer with him on this chilly night, like a pair of gloves. They would had worked splendidly.

Just as Kuroko was beginning to doze off and different kind of random ideas invaded his mind, the phone on his desk suddenly rang. It was a loud and an annoying tone and could seemingly wake up the entire neighborhood. At least that's what Kuroko thought when the obnoxious ringing reached his sensitive ears. His already closed eyes shot open and temporary panic overwhelmed him when he realized the current situation. Someone was calling him, and not just anyone, but someone who most likely _needed help._ The tealnet's throat tightened at the realization, but he, after all, had a duty to take care of. So after a few moments of hesitation and pure anxiousness, Kuroko managed to bring his hand to the plain phone and pick it up. He slowly brought it over to his ear and took in a deep breath.

''Hello,'' Kuroko spoke as calmly as he could, though he didn't manage to hide his anxiousness, at least that was what he thought. When he didn't get an immediate answer, he added: ''Can you hear me?''

Only silence met the tealnet's words. Somehow that didn't seem too surprising, though Kuroko still unconsciously nibbled his lower lip and quickly glanced around the room. No one seemed to be paying any attention to him, not that he expected it. But what now...

_Okay, okay._

''Hello, can I talk to you?'' Kuroko started once again, never changing his tone. Maybe now... Silence somehow seemed worse than words in this situation.

'' _...The crisis hot-line, huh,_ '' finally some sort of answer came from the other end. Kuroko was momentarily taken aback by the coldness and the complete indifference of the voice. Did this person really need help, or?..

''I suppose so,'' The tealnet unconsciously took a pen from the table with his free hand and began playing with it to ease his slowly rising nerves. ''Do you need any help? You can feel free talking to me.''

'' _...I didn't call to get emotional support,_ '' Now the voice sounded slightly bitter. Kuroko had to strain his hearing to maybe try and understand where this person was. It seemed as if he was outside at the moment from the sound of it.

''Oh, I see,'' the blue-haired male mumbled. ''We can talk anyway if you'd like to. Though I am interested in what was your reason for calling then.''

'' _...I merely figured that there was no harm in talking to some stranger before..._ '' A sigh went over to Kuroko's line. '' _Yeah.''_

''We can just talk then, like I said,'' the tealnet answered carefully. He wasn't dense and could clearly understand what the person on the other end meant. The only question was, what to do? ''But don't you have any other people you'd want to speak to rather than a complete stranger?'' Though if truth be told, that voice somehow seemed slightly familiar. Maybe it was just Kuroko's imagination, since how could one forget _such_ a voice. It was as smooth as silk, though still had that hint of coldness in it and bite. If the circumstances had been different, Kuroko was almost sure it also sounded authoritative. It gave off a similar vibe.

'' _That is what you're supposed to say, isn't it?_ '' A pause. ''... _No, there isn't. I had enough of that._ ''

''That's... I see, if that's what you think... '' Kuroko decided to say. ''Still, I recommend you reconsider.''

'' _You recommend I reconsider?_ '' the voice sounded slightly surprised, but he was quick to hide it and bitterness took over it's place. '' _I suppose you'd recommend I reconsider other things too._ ''

''I would say that, yes.''

'' _...I'm interested, do give me your reason why. You don't know me after all._ ''

''I...'' Kuroko started, but drifted off. It was true after all, he didn't know this person. Besides, the tealnet seriously doubted that words about “the value of life” and “regret” would work on him. He just didn't seem like that kind of person. From his tone he sounded more or less sure of his decision and was only _interested the last time._ Kuroko honestly felt like playing some sort of game, only the wrong answer would most likely result in death.

So why did Kuroko think a complete stranger should reconsider suicide? _Now at least..._

''Because it's cold,'' the tealnet finally answered bluntly without thinking too much about his words.

'' _...I beg your pardon?''_

''It's cold today, or rather tonight. I can hear that you're outside and, by the sound of it, near a river, so most likely on some sort of bridge. That's where you saw this number, correct?''

''... _I'm a bit dazed, please be so kind and explain further._ ''

''Well, since it's late autumn, the water is very cold this time of the year, so it would sting very much if you jumped in it. Sure, if that's your final action, then it would eventually fade away, but before that you'd probably endure a lot of pain. Besides, drowning is a very unpleasant way to die anyway. Your lungs get filled with icy water and it burns very much. That is a very nasty feeling. I know, I almost drowned once and I would never want to end my life like that. Hanging is a better option, since if you're lucky, you don't suffocate, but break your neck's vertebra and die immediately. There is also no blood mess for others to clean.''

There was a long silent pause after Kuroko's words. In that time the tealnet fully realize his words and could only slap himself mentally. Why on Earth did he say all those things? It was no wonder the person on the other line didn't know what to answer, even Kuroko didn't know.

'' _...Did you just seriously lecture me about the way I decided to end my life?_ '' the person finally spoke, though his voice was slow and full of disbelief. Kuroko couldn't blame him. '' _My, I certainly didn't expect such an answer. Are you suggesting I hang myself then?_ ''

''I'm not... I'm terrible at this, aren't I,'' the tealnet muttered and rubbed one of his eyes. Maybe it was the sleepiness catching up to him. ''I'm not suggesting you end your life by any means.''

'' _Only how it would be better to do it._ ''

''Ah... I'm sorry, that was the first thought that popped into my head.''

'' _You didn't deny my last statement,_ '' the person on the other line pointed out. A tint of amusement was now audible in his voice and that didn't help Kuroko at all, though he sincerely hoped whatever he was doing was somehow working even just a bit. The tealnet didn't feel like he was the right man for this job.

''...I suppose I really did talk about that...'' Kuroko mumbled a bit uncomfortably. He quickly glanced around the room once more to make sure no one was listening. It wouldn't probably look too good if they heard this conversation. ''But only, you know, theoretically speaking. I didn't imply you should do that.''

'' _Theoretically... Correct me if I'm mistaken, but you seem to think that I would change my mind if you talked about the water's coldness rather than the regret and grief I would leave behind with my actions._ ''

''...How should I put this,'' Kuroko sighed and ran his free hand through his messy locks, while trying to come up with a decent answer. ''The fact that you pointed that out suggests that you understand what will the consequences be. If that's true, then I can only assume that you simply don't care about others enough and just concentrate about your own problems. That would mean that you're either a heartless person or your troubles and inner struggles are so big that they overwhelm all other senses. I don't believe the first theory to be correct for various reasons. So the most likely assumption would be the second one. If that's true, then why would you want to hurt yourself further if you're already in pain? At least leave this world peacefully. Oh, that gave me an idea, probably the best way to pass would be to overdose sleeping pills, that way you wouldn't feel any pain at all.''

'' _...Did I call the correct line?_ ''

_Good job, Tetsuya, good job._

''I'm starting to doubt that as well.''

'' _Right... Either way, I feel the need to correct you. I did not decide to... do this because I feel too much pain, but because I no longer find life meaningful. All my life I tried so hard to be someone, to please everyone, to always be right. But... there is no point in that in the end. I realized we're only hamsters running in a never-ending wheel and I refuse to dance on fate's palm like that. All that effort, all those struggles, all of it don't matter, nothing matters. It's all so pointless it suffocating. Why must I keep fighting if I'm not going to win?_ ''

''I know that everyone says this, but by committing suicide you're not going to solve anything. I don't feel like I'm in a correct position to lecture you about life, but hear me out. By ending your life you would only submit to that fate you seem to dislike so much. Nothing would change. Time would only continue flowing as it was and your existence would fade away into oblivion, confirming your thought about life being meaningless. It wouldn't change anything. However, if you somehow managed to live a meaningless life meaningfully, that would be the highest point you could reach regarding fate's games. Then you wouldn't be just dancing on it's palm, but playing together as equals. It's impossible to overpower fate, but it's possible to understand that and accept it. If you would do that, you would no longer be played with. However, if you end everything before the second stage, the accepting part, then fate would come out victorious.''

Silence overtook the pair after Kuroko finished his speech. The one on the other end was probably registering everything the tealnet just said. Truth be told, he too was rather dazed by his own words. Was it the night's doing? Those people who said that strange thoughts enter one's mind in the night were correct it seemed.

'' _...I must say, I'm quite taken aback by your words. That honestly never occurred to me... To live a meaningless life meaningfully... You say that all you need to do is accept that there's no real meaning behind your existence. If you understand that and chose to live with it, you are more or less challenging fate, since one would assume that if a person realizes that everything he's doing is meaningless, then he would rather end his life than live with that knowing, correct?_ ''

''That's right. Isn't your situation like this?''

'' _I suppose... But doesn't that mean that you also realize that your life is completely insignificant? And yet, here you are._ ''

''Yes, I understand that,'' Kuroko spoke in a hushed, though calm tone. His eyes drifted to one of the other volunteers who also seemed to be talking to someone. ''I simply chose the other path. I really do try to live as meaningfully as I can, to leave something behind that would remind the rest of the world about me even after my life ends. That would be proof that I did indeed do something meaningful, that I battled the inevitable cruel fate. One of the ways to accomplish that would be to help others. They would remember you. And if you create something, it feels as if you put a part of your soul into it. That way you would live on forever. But not meaninglessly, since a creation always has significance,'' The tealnet averted his eyes to the plain table in front of him and released a sigh. ''I'm sorry, do I even make sense?''

'' _I would say you do. I dare to say I've never heard similar words from anyone before. You mentioned creating... Are you a creator?''_

''I'm a student at one of the universities for creative arts. I enjoy painting very much.''

'' _Painting, huh... Are you talented?_ ''

''Nothing too special,'' Kuroko mumbled and his free hand found it's way to one of the pens on the table. He once again began playing with it between his fingers. Something he did when he felt uncomfortable. ''It doesn't really matter how good you are anyway. The important thing is to love what you do.''

'' _That's what you say... Is it really true? You must enjoy your work? Isn't being good at it enough?_ ''

''No, that's not right. If you wish to live a meaningful life, you must live to the fullest. You must love life.''

'' _Love life..._ ''

''There's no other way. If you force yourself to do something, especially for others and not yourself, then yes, your life will become truly meaningless. No matter what others might tell me, no matter how much I might earn, if I continue to love what I do and to find peace while doing that, my soul will be at ease. Creating is truly an incredible thing.''

''... _Do you suppose I should try that as well?_ '' The person's voice sounded slightly hesitant.

''I believe you should. Being able to express your feelings and thoughts through any form of art is a wonderful experience.''

'' _I see... I'm not implying that I changed my mind, but, as you said, 'theoretically' speaking, what are the chances if I would call again I would get you?_ ''

''Almost non-existent I'd say, since I'm only covering for a friend tonight,'' Kuroko answered before humming for a few moments. ''But I could give you my personal phone number if you, again, theoretically speaking, decided you want to talk again.''

'' _...Alright._ ''

An almost invisible smile tugged Kuroko's lips as he slowly dictated his number. Sure, the man on the other end was a complete stranger, but, if truth be told, the tealnet enjoyed talking with him and hoped that his words helped the other even just a bit. Maybe, just maybe, he'll get that phone call.

''I'll be waiting then,'' Kuroko spoke warmly. His grip on the phone against his ear tightened ever-so-slightly without him even realizing it. ''Have a nice night.''

The mystery person didn't answer anything to that, only silence greeted the tealnet's good-bye. And after a few moments the line went off, leaving Kuroko with a plain beeping sound.

He sincerely hoped he'll get that phone call.

Maybe this sleepless night wasn't a complete waste.

 

 


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for your support and for reading this~ Let's keep the first chapters calm, shall we? There's this saying 'Calm before the storm', so ya, let's do that, should be fun.

As any other student out there, Kuroko once in awhile had those times when you just have so much on your hands that you have no choice than to work deep into the night, or, in other words, 'pull an all-nighter'. Well, this certain tealnet didn't have special powers and such times did come every now and then. It just so happened that for a few days his motivation to draw this specific piece was incredibly low and now he had a half-finished draft and he needed to present the full drawing by tomorrow. So naturally desperate times called for desperate measures. That meant that it was almost three AM and Kuroko was just managing to keep his eyes open and focus on the task at hand, though he still dozed off here and there. However, just as the sharp end of his pencil broke off due to slightly too much pressure from Kuroko's hand, his phone on the bed began vibrating and brought the tealnet out of his frustrated thoughts.

When the young student heard the sound, he momentarily froze. He naturally found it odd that someone would call him at this hour, all his acquaintances and friends _should_ be sleeping by now. Even if they weren't, what business did they have with him in the middle of the night?

Slowly, Kuroko stood up from the table and approached the vibrating device. He picked it up and slightly frowned at the word 'Unknown' displayed where the caller's ID should be. Hesitatingly, the tealnet accepted it and brought it to his ear.

''Hello?''

For a few moments there was only silence and Kuroko was beginning to think that there might have been a mistake, but those thoughts were quickly chased away.

'' _...Good evening, did I wake you up?_ '' a smooth voice came from the other end. The young student immediately recognized it and that lit him up. All sleep was long forgotten.

''Oh, it's you!..'' Kuroko expressed his surprise, though it was, of course, pleasant. He hadn't heard from this person for nearly a week after all and that anxious feeling never left, so naturally he felt relieved now. ''No, you didn't, I was just working on a certain piece for one of my lessons... What about you? How have you been?''

'' _Fairly well, thank you. I'm glad I didn't wake you up, but even if it's school-work, you shouldn't tire yourself too much. Sleep is crucial for a young body after all._ ''

''I could say the same to you,'' a light chuckle escaped Kuroko lips. He glanced over to his table and decided to return there. ''You should have also been sleeping at this hour.''

'' _...I didn't feel like it. Besides, it doesn't really matter to me, one more night is nothing._ ''

''You're rather hypocritical, you know that?''

'' _I suppose. Your health is more important anyway._ ''

''How so?'' the tealnet inquired curiously as he sat back on his chair and took his pencil and sharpener.

'' _Because you're so young, yet you seem to understand how life should work._ ''

''I wouldn't say that... I just have principles that I follow,'' Kuroko shrugged. He twisted the plain pencil between his fingers for a bit before he gripped it. ''Everyone does.''

'' _Yours are one of the most interesting ones though._ ''

''That's good I suppose,'' the tealnet slightly chuckled and began doodling something at the corner of the paper. ''Are you interested enough to begin following them as well?''

''... _I'm still deciding on that._ ''

''Of course, do as you like,'' Kuroko hummed as he continued sketching random shapes. ''This just occurred to me, but how should I address you? I assume you wish to stay anonymous?''

'' _...I don't know, I'm not sure. But yes, I would like for my real full name to stay unknown._ ''

''How about just first names then?''

'' _...I suppose we could._ ''

''Alright then,'' Kuroko's lips shaped into a small smile. ''Call me Tetsuya then.''

'' _Seijuurou._ ''

''It's nice to talk to you, Seijuurou-kun.''

'' _You as well, Tetsuya._ ''

It just so happened that Kuroko got a long lecture about finishing his work on time the next day.

* * *

For some unknown reason Seijuurou only called him in the middle of the night, around three o'clock. Because of that for the past few weeks Kuroko was extremely sleep-deprived, which resulted in him accidentally dozing off in the middle of some lessons. But he would never point that out to Seijuurou, since he really did enjoy his calls and felt as if he was helping the other even just a bit. Maybe it wasn't much, but if it kept his dark thoughts at bay, it was enough for the tealnet. And little by little he began impatiently waiting for those night calls himself. However, he still couldn't sustain his curiosity.

''Say, Seijuurou-kun, why do you always call so late?'' Kuroko finally asked one time. It was already around four AM and the tealnet was distracting himself from sleep by sketching some random pictures. He tended to do that quite a lot recently while talking to the other.

'' _I don't know exactly... During the day I don't have a lot of time and when night comes I just somehow begin wishing to talk to you, since... Ah, never mind._ ''

''I see,'' the tealnet kept his curiosity at bay this time. He honestly wanted to hear the end of that sentence, but it was better to be careful with this person. He was extremely closed. ''Do you reckon I could call you sometimes as well?''

'' _...If you wish to, then I can't refuse. But like I said, during the day my schedule is extremely busy._ ''

''Are you not a student then?'' Kuroko inquired as he took his eraser and wiped the strange shape clean off the page.

'' _I am, but I also have extra work regarding my father's company, since when I finish my studies, I'll inherit it._ ''

''Oh, that's interesting to know,'' the young student hummed. Be began doodling something else. ''Do you enjoy that kind of work?''

'' _...That's..._ ''

''I see,'' Kuroko immediately understood. The pencil stopped momentarily on the sheet of paper. ''It seems you have a lot on your mind.''

'' _That's true... But it doesn't really matter whether I enjoy what I have to do or not, it's not for me to decide._ ''

''You seem to fail to see the point of my principles.''

'' _...You don't understand my situation._ ''

''I would if you told me, but I won't force you. Just remember that if you'll ever need someone to talk to, I'll always be there.''

'' _Even if it's three in the night?_ ''

''Even if it's three in the night,'' a chuckle left Kuroko lips.

'' _...Thank you_.''

 


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alright, let's stir things up now, shall we?  
> Thank you for your support!

'' _Tetsuya, remember, you told me about trying to create something?_ ''

''Of course,'' Kuroko answered interested. This phone call was rather unexpected actually, since at the moment the young student was heading to his university via metro. Seijuurou never called him at this hour.

'' _Well, I tried composing a piece... I still have some time before I need to head out today, so would you like to hear it?_ ''

''I would love to,'' A warm smile tugged Kuroko's pale lips.

The tealnet heard how Seijuurou on the other end got up from wherever he was sitting on and walked through some rooms before he ended up at his destination. He placed the phone on some sort of surface before taking a seat. Kuroko slightly shifted and waited with anticipation for the sound to come.

Finally a sweet melody played by a piano began resonating through the phone and the tealnet immediately froze when he heard it. It started of softly with high notes in a slow tempo, but immediately escalated. The sound was gentle and light, painted with warm, yet with a small tint of dark colors. That seed of coldness remained the entire fast high part and eventually the melody cut off and resumed in a slower tempo and the notes turned into lower ones. Now the song was careful, as if unsure of itself. That seed began sprouting. It began spreading wider through the melody, slowly consuming it. And even though the piece was being played with professionalism, Kuroko couldn't help but get an uneasy feeling. Some part of him didn't wish to hear the third part, but the other couldn't sustain it's curiosity. And finally the second part stopped and after a moment the next started. Kuroko had enough musical education to understand that the usual third part was skipped and went immediate to the finale. That much was obvious from the tempo, which was similar to the first part's. However, now that once a seed of darkness dominated the whole melody. The sound ranged from the lowest to the highest tones, and it sounded as if two separate melodies were clashing. This perhaps symbolized the inner struggle the pianist was going through. Kuroko's heartbeat even escalated while listening to the unnerving, yet beautiful sound. It held so many colors, which, sadly, were mostly of the darker palette. Such strong emotions broke through with the help of sound. It was probably incredibly hard to portray them by mere words, but music was different. It didn't ask questions, it just listened and spread the thoughts to anyone who was willing to hear its story. It so happened that that someone was Kuroko this time, who was mesmerized by it. Even if the sound was coming from through phones, it was enough to put the listener into some sort of trance. The human heart was such a complicated thing after all.

Finally the last part came to an end, but not how one would expect. Just by the end the tempo increased even more and it felt as if something was building up, so big that it would collapse any moment, that the melody would break. However, just as it seemingly reached it's peak, the notes cut off, leaving a lingering sound in the air. Kuroko had to blink a few times before he finally got out of that strange trance and came back to his senses. The song ended so abruptly that it momentarily dazed it's listener. As if... it wasn't yet finished.

'' _That's about it, though I'm not certain whether I want to end it there,_ '' Seijuurou spoke after a few moments when he took the phone from the piano. '' _...What did you think_?''

''I...'' Kuroko had to stop for a few seconds to gather his thoughts. ''It was so beautiful, yet so mysterious... Correct me if I'm wrong, but that sounded like a sonata, only from three parts?''

'' _I suppose it was,_ '' a dry chuckle traveled through the phones. '' _I have yet to name it though_.''

''It was very beautiful, Seijuurou-kun, really. You have an amazing talent.''

'' _Do I now... Thank you for your words, I'm glad you enjoyed._ ''

''You should continue creating, it was breath-taking.''

* * *

 

Sometimes, when you think that everything is okay...

''Oh, you're getting married?'' Kuroko asked a bit surprised. He was already laying in his bed, since he didn't have any extra work, when he received an unexpected call from Seijuurou.

'' _Yes, although it's an arranged marriage._ ''

''Arranged marriage...'' the tealnet mumbled more to himself. He started up his gray ceiling before speaking again. ''Do you _want_ to marry her?''

'' _...I would say yes. Even though I have no say in this, I have known her since childhood and always felt something deeper regarding her. I believe this should work out._ ''

''I'm happy for you then,'' Kuroko cast a small, yet genuine smile. ''A new start with your own family will be good for you.''

'' _I do hope so_.''

...it is actually a mere illusion.

* * *

 

'' _Tetsuya, have you ever loved someone?_ ''

''Loved?'' Kuroko repeated the question a bit dazed. It was yet again a deep night, but he didn't mind. Something in Seijuurou's tone seemed off. ''If you're talking about romantic love, then no, I don't think I have.''

'' _...I see._ ''

''Seijuurou-kun,'' the tealnet started slightly uncertainty. ''Is something the matter? Why did you suddenly ask such a question?''

'' _...I fear I might have developed similar feeling towards her._ ''

''Fear? Isn't that a good thing?''

'' _...I'm not sure. I don't know how she feels about this._ ''

''Oh,'' Kuroko mumbled. He averted his eyes to the window and gazed into the darkness.

'' _Tetsuya, what do you think is love?_ ''

The tealnet hummed for a bit before deciding on his words. ''I've never been in love, but I heard it's a complicated thing. If you're asking about that fluffy feeling, then I'm not sure... But I think true love is when you put other's wellbeing before yours. If you truly love someone, you care for him more than yourself, his happiness is more important to you than yours. ...Does that answer your question?''

'' _...I suppose. Thank you once again_.''

''I'm glad. Remember, you can always talk to me when you feel the need, I'll always answer.''

''…''

Secretly, Kuroko wished he could speak to Seijuurou in person. That tone of his made the tealnet feel uneasy.

 


	4. Chapter 4

For a few days there was nothing. No calls, no some sort of messages. At first Kuroko wrote it off as nothing, that Seijuurou simply had a lot on his hands at the moment and probably didn't have enough time. He was, after all, getting married soon. That may have been the case. But when those days slowly turned into weeks and there was still silence, the tealnet began to worry. He tried calling himself, but all he got was an answering machine. As more time passed, that heavy feeling in his chest only grew. He couldn't shake off the thought that something had to be wrong. Would Seijuurou fall silent just like that? Kuroko didn't even realize before now how attached he had grown to the mystery person on the other end of the line. He wished to hear his voice once again, to know that he was okay, but...

Then, one night, when Kuroko couldn't sleep, so he decided to paint something, his phone vibrated. At first it startled the tealnet, but he quickly composed himself and shot to the bed where the device laid. His heart lurched when he read the caller's ID and immediately answered.

''Hello? Seijuurou-kun?'' Kuroko spoke, not even trying to hide his worry.

'' _...Tetsuya, hello,_ '' came the other's reply and the tealnet almost dropped his phone after hearing it. Seijuurou spoke in a hushed and slightly hoarse voice, but even that wasn't the main thing. He simply sounded so empty, so broken that it made Kuroko's chest tighten with unexplainable feelings. '' _We haven't talked in awhile, huh._ ''

''Seijuurou-kun, how are you feeling? Where are you?'' the tealnet asked quickly as an idea started blooming in his mind.

'' _...I don't know. I don't know anymore... I wanted to talk to you._ ''

''Okay, okay, let's talk,'' Kuroko spoke as gently as he could. ''Where were you these past few weeks?''

''... _Why aren't you sleeping, Tetsuya? Did you have some unfinished work again?_ '''

''No, I just couldn't sleep. I've been worrying about you, Seijuurou-kun, so please, answer my question.''

'' _Worrying about me... Were you... There's no need, I'm fine._ ''

''You don't sound like it,'' Kuroko objected firmly.

'' _Ah... I'm sorry, Tetsuya, but I really am fine... I'm sorry, but I just... don't think I will be able to create that meaning to my life. Not with... It would be better for everyone if I just... If I just ended everything before things went downhill even more..._ ''

''Seijuurou-kun, what are you talking about?'' the tealnet spoke in a soft voice, but he didn't manage to mask the rising horror in his chest. He couldn't mean...

'' _I'm sorry, Tetsuya, but I... I really don't want to lose. I don't want to lose. However, if I continue the same way, I will. I'll lose to everything I hate, to everything I tried to defeat all my life. I can't have that, Tetsuya, I can't..._ ''

''Where are you right now, Seijuurou-kun?'' Kuroko asked again, this time expecting some sort of answer. ''Are you outside?''

'' _...Yeah, but I don't know where exactly... I wasn't looking, you see_.''

''Okay, okay, then just tell me your surroundings, tell me what you see.''

'' _There is... a valley to the left and streets to the left, front and behind. There are trees around me. They're cold, Tetsuya, but I don't mind. There is also... a bridge from one side of the valley to the other. I can't see anything else._ ''

''Alright, I understand,'' the tealnet spoke as a certain area appeared in his mind. He began getting ready to go outside as quickly as he could. ''Stay where you are, okay, Seijuurou-kun? Don't go anywhere.''

''…''

''Seijuurou-kun, are you still there?'' Kuroko asked urgently as he took his coat from the hanger.

''... _You know, it's snowing here. I think you were right, the most easiest way would be to simply fall asleep and never wake up. And don't worry, I'm not going anywhere, I like it here. Besides, I don't think I'd manage anyway.''_

''No, don't fall asleep,'' the young student commanded. He took his keys from one of the drawers and unlocked the door. ''Talk to me, okay? Let's talk, don't fall asleep.''

'' _What do you want to talk about?_ ''

''You...'' Kuroko tried to think something up on the spot. He had already left his apartment and was heading towards the exit. ''Did you come up with a name for that sonata of yours?''

'' _Oh, that... I'm still not sure, but what about 'Sleepless Night'? It felt like it, didn't it?_ ''

''Yeah, I think that's a good name,'' Kuroko agreed. How he wished he owned a car at these times. ''Fitting I'd say.''

'' _Mhm._ ''

''Did you try creating anything else?'' the tealnet immediately asked when he felt that the other was slipping away.

'' _...Yeah, but it's still unfinished..._ ''

''Then you should finish it, shouldn't you? You can't leave it like that. And I still want to hear it.''

'' _I don't know whether I will_.''

''It's not about whether you will or won't. It's about whether you want to.''

'' _Is that so... I don't know what I want anymore. I don't know whether I have any more wishes._ ''

''If that's the case, then can you wish for me just this time?''

'' _For you?_ ''

''Yes, I want you to wish to stay awake. Do not close your eyes. Wait for just a little bit longer.''

'' _But I'm tired, Tetsuya... It would be so easy to just fall asleep._ ''

''It would be, but didn't you want to see my paintings? You said so the other day,'' Kuroko was now just talking whatever came to his mind. His destination wasn't too far from here.

'' _I did say that... Yes, I would like to see your creations._ ''

''See? That's at least one thing you'd want to do. Now I want for you to think of other things you wish for, no matter how small. Grant my own wish and tell me yours, that's all I'm asking for.''

'' _You want to know my wishes?_ ''

''Yes, very much.''

'' _But I... I suppose it's been a long time since I've eaten tofu soup... It would be nice to do that again._ ''

''Good, okay, understood. Continue now.''

Seijuurou tried his best, he really did. He kept granting Tetsuya's wish, but his answers were becoming slower and slower. There wasn't much things he wanted anymore after all. The cold white snow kept ascending on his freezing body, but he didn't feel any of the pain. He only gazed up the dark sky and watched how the small crystals kept falling down without any signs of stopping. He forced his light blue lips to move, but his mind was slowly drifting away. He forgot his initial request. Words kept leaving his aching throat, but he had long lost the understanding of them. The voice from the other end kept reaching his ears once in awhile, but that also seemed like a blur already. He couldn't understand what was being said and didn't have the strength to change that. What was the point of it anyway? He felt tired, oh so tired. He just wanted to sleep. He couldn't even understand that he may never wake up, his mind was too dazed for that. All he knew was...

_So tired._

_So so tired._

_Sotiredsotiredsotiredsotiredsotiredsotiredsotiredsotired_

_So_

_incredibly_

_tired._

_Forgive me. I wish to rest now. To rest from everything._

_Let me rest._

He didn't feel how his grip on the cold phone loosened and the device hit the hard ground, already covered in a thin layer of white. His eyes slowly dropped and the frozen falling crystals disappeared from his sight. That was the last thing he wished for. He was tired of fighting, of trying, of succeeding, of exceeding everyone's expectations, of never meeting them, of living, of everything.

 


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Now, I just had to post a chapter on Kuro-chin's birthday, right? Enjoy!
> 
> Happy birthday blueberry muffin!

As soon as Kuroko heard the light thud, which indicated that the phone on the other end hit the ground, he fastened his pace into a run. For the last few minutes Seijuurou had been rambling nonsense and the tealnet doubted he himself understood what he was saying. He sounded so tired... Was it the cold weather's doing? He had to admit, it really was very chilly tonight. Even with his coat Kuroko could feel the coldness seeping in. However, all thoughts about that were wiped away when that phone hit the ground. Kuroko broke into a run with his only goal being the park not too far from here. Trees... Seijuurou mentioned trees, he said they were cold, which meant that he had to be next to one. If he was indeed at the place Kuroko thought he was, then no one would find him until morning, since it was a rather secluded area. _What on Earth was Seijuurou doing there?_ Was he... No, that couldn't have been it. All the assumptions that invaded Kuroko's mind were worse than the last one. That, however, was not the main trouble. Now the tealnet needed to get to that park.

Finally the young student made the last turn and the small green, although now covered in a thin layer of snow area, appeared before his eyes. Kuroko didn't slow down until he reached the actual place. He didn't even feel the stinging sensation in his sides and aching lungs. All the tealnet could focus on was scanning the area through the thick curtain of snowflakes. He frantically moved around, since he couldn't see too far due to the weather. Just then the color of red caught his eye and his heartbeat accelerated at that. Without wasting any time the tealnet ran over to the side of the park.

Next to a single tree laid the person of Kuroko's focus. He had his back against the cold trunk while his head hung lifelessly on one of the sides. Horror spread inside the tealnet's chest when he realized that the male only wore plain indoor attire. A small layer of snow was covering his clothes and the same could have been said about his seemingly vivid crimson hair. By the amount of it Kuroko could assume that he was there even about the time it started snowing. Seeing the unmoving figure only made the tealnet fasten his already quick pace.

As soon as Kuroko was finally besides the unfortunate male, he immediately knelt down next to him. The tealnet quickly removed his gloves and placed two fingers against the side of the other's cold pale neck. A wave of relief washed over him when he sensed a beating, even if it was abnormally slow. At least that meant that he still had time. However, Seijuurou's lips were dangerously pale, even a bit blue. Parts of his face had unnerving red areas and his black eyelashes were covered in white. The male was unconscious, since he probably slipped away due to the coldness. That only meant that Kuroko had to act _immediately_.

Without wasting any time, the tealnet swept as much snow as he could from the other's clothes and his hair before removing his own coat and wrapping it around the frozen male. After that Kuroko took off his scarf and carefully covered Seijuurou's neck and the lower part of his face with it. The young student then took both of the other's frozen hands and gently rubbed them against his own in the attempt of creating warmth even just a bit. He blew some warm air before he took his own gloves and slipped them on Seijuurou's hands. After all that was done Kuroko was beginning to get ready to pick the other from the cold ground, but the sight of a dropped phone by his side caught his eye. It probably belonged to Seijuurou, so the tealnet took it and placed it inside his jeans pocket. With that done, the tealnet lifted the unconscious male with some difficulty and wrapped his limp arms around his own neck from behind. It was a bit inconvenient that Seijuurou was higher than Kuroko, but the young artist couldn't dwell on that. Using all his strength, the tealnet tightly gripped the other's arms and slightly lifted him from the ground, so that he would be able to carry him.

''Ah... Hang in there, Seijuurou-kun,'' Kuroko mumbled, even if he knew the other couldn't hear him. You may never know. ''You'll be okay.''

It wasn't an easy trip back. The snow didn't cease to fall down on the two males as Kuroko heavily made his way through the empty streets. His weight was certainly not as light as a feather, but the tealnet tried his best nevertheless. He could feel Seijuurou's rigid and weak breaths against his shivering neck, and that only motivated him to continue going. He had a task to do, one he created for himself, but was planning on seeing it through the end. At the moment it didn't seem as if Seijuurou had anyone else to turn to. First of all, he called _Tetsuya_ out of all people, someone he had never even met. If he had truly wanted help, wouldn't he had called a friend or something like that?.. He should have... But he didn't. If he hadn't called Kuroko, no one would have known about him situation. He would have frozen to death there. That was the thought that made the tealnet drop everything and venture out into the dark night in the search of a lost soul. If Seijuurou had no one else to turn to, Tetsuya would become that someone. He won't let him to simply leave, definitely not like this.

''Seijuurou-kun... What happened? Why did you end up in this kind of situation?''

_Why did you call me of all people?_

_What would have happened if I hadn't come?_

_Do you realize, Seijuurou-kun, how much I worried about you... Why didn't you call earlier?_

_Why did you wait so long?_

_Please, I want you to trust me more._

…

Finally, after struggling longer than he had wanted, Kuroko made it back to him apartment along with the still unconscious redhead. Not wasting any time, he unlocked the door and carried the other in. By now Kuroko himself was shaking with coldness, but that wasn't the most important thing at the moment. He had to take care of Seijuurou first. With that thought he took a deep breath and carried him to his bedroom. The apartment was rather small, it only had two rooms, but it was enough for this young student. He never intended for anyone to stay with him, but life seemed to enjoy messing everything up.

Kuroko carefully placed the unconscious male on his bed and moved back a bit to catch his breath. This trip certainly took a lot of his energy. But he couldn't dwell on that too much, he'd have enough time later. With that the tealnet moved back to the other and took off his own coat, gloves and scarf. They were covered with a thin layer of snow, so he needed to clean them anyway. Of course, it would have been ideal to also give Seijuurou some dry clothes, but Kuroko most certainly didn't wish to do anything before he woke up. That would definitely cross the line. But if he would leave Seijuurou with cold wet clothes, it's a high change he would get ill... Maybe he could just remove the shirt? That should work for now.

After inhaling deeply and exhaling, the tealnet moved closer and began carefully unbuttoning Seijuurou's shirt. A wave of relief washed over him when he saw that the male had a t-shirt underneath, which made this a whole lot easier. It didn't seem to be touched by snow all that much, so that was good.

After that was done, Kuroko moved the other male a bit higher to the pillows. Various ideas about how to warm him up quicker flooded the student's mind as he took the covers from the side of his bed and gently placed them on top of the unconscious man. A certain thought entered his mind, one that his mother always seemed to point out whenever they talked about similar things. Every time his mother would say that the best way to warm a frozen person up is to use your own body heat. It is, after all, a high one and seeps into the other person slowly, gently warming him up. However, such a thought made a faint pink taint the tealnet's cheeks. Could he do that? Kuroko most certainly did not wish for this situation to grow more awkward, but if it was the best choice... Sure, there were other means to grant warmth, but this one was the fastest and the most efficient one. Besides, Seijuurou was unconscious and would most likely be for awhile. Kuroko could just warm him up for a bit and then head to the kitchen and prepare something for when the redhead awakes. That should be a good plan.

Swallowing his slight embarrassment down, the tealnet unbuttoned his own slightly wet from the snow shirt and placed on one of the chairs. After a moment of hesitation, Kuroko approached the bed and slowly slipped beneath the covers. This would be incredibly awkward if the redhead decided to wake up before time, but the tealnet couldn't dwell on that too much. Exhaling a deep breath, Kuroko carefully turned the unconscious male to his side and embraced him. Seijuurou was in fact very cold, it even stung the tealnet's warm skin. However, the student only slightly bit his lower lip and moved closer to the other, hoping he would grant more warmth, completely uncaring about his own wellbeing. He was not the important one here after all.

From such a close proximity Kuroko could look at Seijuurou more closely. He honestly could have sworn he had seen him before, he seemed too familiar... His voice was as well, so it couldn't be a coincidence. The tealnet traveled way back in his memory, trying to recall from where he knew this red-haired man. And that name, Seijuurou, Seijuurou... That also rang some sort of bell... If only he could connect all the dots...

_Ah!_

Sudden realization hit Kuroko's troubled mind, which made his blue eyes widen by a few fractions. He remembered now. A few years ago in high-school there was this teen around his age, who was known to the entire school for his achievements, richness and unyielding character. From the moment he entered that school he was always the first and the best in all fields, no one dared to defy him openly. Add his God-given charming appearance that made all the girls and occasionally even boys flock around him to all that and you get the perfect student and son. Everyone around him envied him, everyone around him looked up to him. He seemed as if a perfect being created almost by mistake, not troubled by absolutely nothing, since he himself was nothing but absolute. However, this is the person that Kuroko pulled out of death's clutches two times now. Who would have thought that someone as absolute as Akashi Seijuurou would experience such distress and misfortune? Maybe people like Kuroko were simply too naïve to begin with if they thought that such a perfect human being was just that – perfect on the outside and on the inside. Of course he couldn't be all that, but what on Earth kept pushing this redhead so drastically that he would even think of resorting to suicide?

However, Kuroko was brought out of his thoughts when the man of his focus began moving. At first it frightened the tealnet, but, to his surprise, the redhead only wrapped his own arms around the young student and moved closer. It was most likely his body subconsciously seeking for more warmth, however, such an assumption did not slowed down Kuroko's heart's wild beating. He wasn't used to such close physical contact, so it was only natural. Besides, Akashi was unbelievably gorgeous, which made the tealnet even more flustered. However, the young student only took in a deep breath and closed his eyes, trying to focus only on the task at hand. He was supposed to simply warm up the unfortunate male, not get dazed by him. Yes, he should focus on that.

 


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm very bad at replying to comments, forgive mee--
> 
> I just get a comment, go all 'AWWW THANK YOU FRIEND' and think 'okay, I'll reply when I'm free' aaaaand I end up forgetting, go me. But really, thank you all for your support, it really means a lot.
> 
> The next chapter may or may not be a bit late, exams are coming up sooo--
> 
> In the mean time, enjoy thisss

Kuroko wasn't sure how much time passed until his guest finally woke up. At one point the tealnet decided that he had warmed the other up enough for now and carefully slipped out of the bed with the intention of heading to the kitchen. He wanted to make something for Akashi to eat or drink when he woke up, it was crucial he regained his strength after all. In the end Kuroko decided that first he'd make some chicken broth, since that was what his mother would always give him whenever the tealnet would return from the chilly outside to warm him up. If truth be told, maybe something more would have been better, but Kuroko was definitely not the best cook, so he figured something more simple would be better, since at least he wouldn't mess it up. However, maybe a few carrots or potatoes wouldn't hurt.

Just when the young student turned off the fire, he heard something from the bedroom and immediately went to check. He didn't turn on the lights, just in case his guest had woken up, which would have bothered his eyes. And indeed, the unfortunate redhead on Kuroko's bed had seemingly regained his consciousness and now was slowly trying to sit up, quietly groaning in pain.

''Careful now,'' Kuroko spoke in a hushed voice as he quickly approached the bed. ''If you're feeling unwell, don't try to sit up and lay back down.''

The redhead shifted his slightly clouded vision to the speaker and tried to make out any features of him. However, that was not an easy task, since the only light source came from the corridor and almost everything in this room was indulged in darkness.

''...Who... are you?'' Akashi finally asked in a slightly hoarse voice, though it was still audibly painted with suspicion. ''Where am I?''

''My name is Kuroko Tetsuya and you are in my apartment. I assume you are Akashi Seijuurou, correct?''

The redhead's previously narrowed eyes widened in surprise at the stranger's name. He lifted himself a bit more on the pillows using his elbows before he spoke again.

''Tetsuya?.. Why am I here?''

''First, I'd like to know how you feel,'' the said tealnet spoke gently and moved a bit closer to the laying male. ''Are you still cold? Does it hurt anywhere?''

''I'm fine,'' Akashi answered as if on instinct, seemingly not even thinking about his answer. Kuroko didn't like that.

''...Well, if that changes, tell me,'' the student said after a moment a bit hesitantly and turned around. ''I'll be right back.''

He quickly went back to the kitchen and prepared a portion of warm broth with a couple of vegetables. After he had found an old tray, he placed the bowl along with a spoon and slice of bread on it and carefully began making his way back to the bedroom. Akashi had moved into a better sitting position by then and was looking around the dim place with his slightly clouded vision. Sure, he wished to understand the situation more as soon as possible, but he had to be patient and cautious.

''I brought you something warm to eat,'' Kuroko announced in a soft tone as he approached the bed. ''I'm sorry if it's not that good though, I'm not a great cooker.''

Akashi remained silent and only watched as the tealnet took a seat on the soft mattress next to him while holding the tray. He then extended his arm and turned on a small desk lamp on the nightstand besides the bed. Even though the light was dim, it still made the redhead slightly narrow his eyes. However, at least now he could more clearly see his host.

''Here,'' the tealnet spoke as he placed the tray on Akashi's covered with a blanket lap and lifted his eyes to meet his guest's. For a moment he was taken aback by them, since the redhead's eyes gleamed like two perfect rubies right back at him and seemed to mesmerize the tealnet. They were so gorgeous, befitting a man of such appearance. However, what slightly dazed the young student was that those two beautiful gems seemed unusually... hollow.

Akashi finally dropped his gaze to the bowl in front of him. After a moment of hesitation, the redhead slowly took the white spoon next to it and lifted the warm bowl from the tray a bit closer. Carefully he scooped a small amount of it and tasted it.

''How is it?'' Kuroko asked curiously after his guest had taken a few more spoons.

''Edible,'' Akashi murmured without really thinking. However, when he did realize his answer, his hand holding the spoon stopped for a moment.

''At least that,'' the tealnet lightly chuckled, not sounding offended at all, which honestly surprised the redhead.

''Ah, I'm sorry. It's good,'' Akashi quickly corrected his mistake, lifting his slightly dull, yet apologetic eyes to his host. ''I'm just... still a bit dazed, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to offend you.''

''It's okay, I assume you usually get food of much better quality, so I understand,'' a small smile tugged Kuroko's lips. ''But now it's important for you to regain your energy.''

The redhead was still rather confused, but kept his tongue behind his teeth and only quietly continued eating the warm meal. On any other occasion he wouldn't be taking food from someone under these kind of circumstances, but if this person really was Tetsuya... Seijuurou trusted him, perhaps even more than he would have liked to admit. The whole realization behind his feelings was quite bewildering actually, since the redhead rarely trusted anyone, and Tetsuya was merely a stranger he had never met and only communicated with through a phone, but somehow, unbeknownst to the male himself, Seijuurou started trusting the other. Perhaps it was his character, or his tone, or his words, or his thoughts, or the fact that he, unlike anyone else in his life, seemed to care--

''I'm sorry, but I'm still a bit confused,'' Akashi ended their silence as he put the spoon on the tray next to the bowl and lifted his eyes to the tealnet in front of him. ''How did I end up in this situation?''

Kuroko was silent for a few moments as he diverted his look from the redhead and instead took the tray and stood up. He seemed to hesitate for a bit before finally speaking.

''Do you remember what happened before you passed out?''

''I'm not sure... My memory is slightly fuzzed,'' Akashi murmured, subconsciously rubbing the side of his head. Honestly, the male seemed rather fine, but that almost unnoticeable pained expression didn't slip past Kuroko's eyes. His head was probably hurting.

''Well, try to recall it while I make you some tea, Akashi-kun,'' Kuroko asked and turned around with the intention of leaving, though he didn't miss how the redhead slightly winced at something. What, Kuroko wasn't sure.

''...Tetsuya...'' the male's hesitant voice stopped the tealnet in his tracks. He glanced over his shoulder to find Akashi looking at him with a small frown. ''How do you know who I am?''

''Oh, you probably don't remember or know this, but we went to the same high-school. It's hard to forget someone like you, Akashi-kun,'' Kuroko answered, carefully observing the other's reaction. To his surprise, all color that Akashi had regained drained from his face at that, which really make Kuroko wonder. ''Is something wrong?''

''No, it's just...'' he spoke in a hushed voice, but in the end just released a sigh and closed his eyes, dropping his head back on the pillows. ''Never mind.''

Kuroko didn't answer anything to that and just quietly left. Akashi seemed quite uneasy, though the tealnet didn't expect anything else. Once he remembered what had happened he would be even more so. Honestly, Kuroko didn't believe the redhead intended on almost freezing to death out there. Something must had happened that night that forced to him to leave his home in a complete rush with a clouded mind and head wherever his legs carried him. And it just so happened that he, extremely fortunately, ended up in a park not too far from Kuroko and was just too tired to move anywhere from that point. But honestly, how lucky were they that they didn't seem to live too far from each other or that Akashi chose that specific place? The tealnet didn't wish to think about what would had happened if he didn't find him.

Just thoughts swirled inside Kuroko's mind as he was brewing tea for his guest. He didn't think Akashi lack of memory would be permanent. In fact, he was rather certain that the redhead would remember everything very soon. However, Kuroko couldn't foresee his reaction. Would he still be confused? Dazzled? Uncomfortable? Uneasy? Perhaps mad?..

Kuroko shook those thoughts away. There was no point in dwelling on them after all. He should get this tea to his guest instead.

Akashi's expression was unreadable. No matter how hard the tealnet tried, he couldn't make out the other's thoughts and emotions. The redhead only silently watched how Kuroko approached him and once again sat down on the bed next to him and handed the warm mug of tea.

''I hope it will be to your liking,'' the artist said in a hushed voice, carefully observing his guest.

Akashi quietly took the mug and looked back at the other, seemingly deciding on his next words. And honestly, they surprised Kuroko.

''Tetsuya... You came for me?''

It seemed he remembered what had happened. But that wasn't what puzzled the tealnet.

''Of course,'' Kuroko answered softly, closely watching the other. ''I care about you, Akashi-kun, wasn't that obvious?''

The redhead's beautiful eyes widened by a small fraction at that. What answer was he expecting, honestly?

''Why?..'' Akashi asked in a slightly hushed, wavering voice. ''Why would you...''

''Why would I not?'' the tealnet tilted his head. ''I grew attached to you over these past few months. It didn't matter than I didn't know how you look or who you really were. And I always care for my friends. I certainly don't wish to see them die. So what kind of question is that?''

The troubled male lightly nibbled on his lower lip, averting his eyes to the mug in his hands. He seemed very troubled. Honestly, it was rather fascinating in a peculiar way. Kuroko remembered Akashi being confident beyond belief with strong reasons for it, more authoritative than any other man the tealnet had met, always commanding yet polite when needed, and it was almost scary how manipulative the teen could had gotten. An absolute human being. And now... If Kuroko told anyone how vulnerable Akashi Seijuurou looked like now, no one would believe him. Not that he was planning on spreading such information in the first place. However, Kuroko couldn't be quite sure, but something about this Akashi seemed different from the one from high-school times. He couldn't yet figure out what, though.

''Listen, Akashi-kun,'' Kuroko started quietly, his voice soft, careful. ''You seem to have a lot on your mind. I won't force you, but you should know that if you'd ever want to talk, I'll always be there. I don't know the extent of your problems, so I can't promise anything for certain, but I would try to my best abilities to help you.''

The redhead remained silent, though Kuroko didn't miss how his slender fingers slightly tightened around the mug. His expression was rather unreadable.

''You can stay here for as long as you need,'' the tealnet decided to add after a pause in a hushed voice. ''If you don't want to return to your home that is.''

After those words Kuroko stood up from the bed. He remembered he should give Akashi a clean change of clothes, since he was still wearing those soaked ones from before. Most of Kuroko's clothes would probably be a bit too small for him, but perhaps he would find something fitting. However, the male was soon brought out of his thoughts when his guest suddenly spoke.

''You're irrational.''

Kuroko glanced at the redhead over his shoulder from the wardrobe. He had his ruby eyes pointed at his host, the previous dull look now painted with more intense colors. Suspicion. Irritation. Confusion.

''How so?''

''You don't know me. Why would you do this?''

''But I do know you.''

''Tell me everything you think you know about me.''

''Well, for one, your name is Akashi Seijuurou,'' Kuroko said, returning to rummage through his wardrobe. ''You are more or less the same age as me. You went to Teikou high-school. You will inherit a big company from your father,'' He side-glanced at his guest, quickly registering the slight frown on his lips, before returning to his search and changing the facts he was saying. ''You are a talented pianist. You enjoy shogi, but can't find a decent enough opponent. You also like tofu soup if I remember correctly.''

With a change of clean, hopefully fitting clothes, Kuroko returned to his guest.

''I wouldn't say I don't know anything about you,'' the tealnet tilted his head and placed the plain attire on the side of the bed. ''Here, a fresh change of clothes. Hopefully they will fit.''

''Not enough to let me into your home.''

''And what do you suppose I should have done then?''

''Leave me, not bother yourself with me.''

''Like everyone else?''

Kuroko didn't mean to say that, the words just somehow left his lips without him realizing that. He regretted it the moment they did though, since at them Akashi pursed his lips and hung his head down, his crimson locks falling over his eyes as his hold on the already slightly cool mug tightened considerably. Kuroko didn't mean to hurt him, he really didn't. It was just that... that certain thought had lingered in the tealnet's mind for quite awhile now, the assumption that Akashi, albeit having people around, was alone. Why else would he, at his breaking point, call Kuroko of everyone? Would he even be where he was if he wasn't alone? Nevertheless, Kuroko shouldn't have said that.

''...I'm sorry,'' the tealnet finally spoke after a long pause, ending the tense silence. ''I didn't mean to hurt you, honestly. I had no right, I understand that. It was an accident. But... to answer you question, how could I have just left you? How could I have...'' Kuroko shook his head and sighed. ''Let's not talk about that now. You need to rest. The bathroom if just outside the door if you'd need it.''

However, as Kuroko was turning around with the intention of leaving the room, his guest's voice stopped him.

''Wait,'' Akashi said, his voice slightly weaker than he would have liked it to be. He placed the mug on a nearby nightstand and lowered his legs to the ground, uncovering himself in the process. ''Where will you be sleeping?''

The tealnet was about to answer truthfully, meaning on the couch, but kept his tongue behind his teeth. Honestly, Akashi was right, he really did know quite little about him, but from what he did, Kuroko got the feeling that his guest won't just simply let him be this humble.

''Don't worry about that, I'll be fine,'' the male decided to answer neutrally, or at least tried, hoping the other would take his answer. When he noticed how Akashi arched an eyebrow at that answer, Kuroko released a soft sigh. ''Look, we're both tired, so please don't be stubborn and just rest. We'll talk more tomorrow.''

And with that the tealnet quickly left the room, closing the door behind him without letting the other say a word. It was true that Kuroko was quite exhausted and he didn't have to energy to argue at the moment. As unfortunate as it was, he had classes tomorrow, which meant very little sleep. He really wished to rest as soon as possible.

Come to think of it... Should Kuroko even head to his lessons the following day? Perhaps it was better to stay with Akashi instead to make sure everything was okay? Either way, he'd decide that in the morning. His mind was too tired to even think at this point.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alsooo, one question (which is probably not gonna be answered a lot, oh well, can't hurt to try). Would you like for the rating to go up eventually? I mean, initially I wasn't planning on it, but now I'm getting all sorts of ideas, sooo... It'd be nice to know what you think :D
> 
> Once again, thank you for reading!


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